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wake up america


I had a dream last night that Jesus finally resurrected and when white people found out he wasn’t white they arrested him for 2000 something years of tax invasion  

(via beyoncebeytwice)

i fuckin hate the type of person who enters a room when a show is on and starts talking. what the fuck is wrong with you. who the fuck raised you. are you an animal. get out of my house

(Source: innercitylights, via beyoncebeytwice)

(Source: poetrytofish)


Best way to end an argument


Oh, wait, you said ”SEND NUDES”? I thought you said “SEND NUKES” hahaha whoops uh i guess you should evacuate your city or something

(via zackisontumblr)


My grandma everyone



So this hot substitute logged into netflix and I wrote down the email with which he did it and used a service (it cost like $2) to find all other accounts connected to that email and I found his (private) twitter so I made a fake twitter of a hot girl and added a bunch of tweets over the course of a month to make it look legit and then I requested to follow him and he let me and he is the most goddamn boring person in the world

you need to be arrested

(via zackisontumblr)


on week two of my #rawfood diet… I feel amazing! who knew eating #raw could be so delish?

what do you wanna do?
idk, what do you wanna do?
idk, what do you wanna do?
idk, what do you wanna do?


my heart says yes but my mom says no

(via hi)



(Source: itsvondell, via zackisontumblr)

President Obama standing next to his Vice President, True Jackson.